I don't think I'm going to keep doing these recurring posts for much longer. They are beginning to feel a little forced and stale. I'd rather just write according to how I feel and what I'm mulling over at the time. I may still do "some things I'm loving", but they'll be sporadic, instead of every Sunday. I'm just not very good at being timely and reliable, as much as I would like to be.
So this will be a bit of a last hurrah (to a series that has existed only a few weeks... it's okay, I don't expect you to mourn) but it's going to be slightly different, because I don't have a compiled list of pretty things to share this time.
It's been a bit of a challenging week. I hope that I don't sound awfully self-absorbed, reflecting upon my friend's misfortune in my last two posts. I cannot compare any struggle that I am experiencing with what she is going through, we all know that. But the truth is that seeing somebody I love being touched by fate in such a drastic way has affected me deeply. Not in a "poor me" way, but in a way that has skewed my take on life and living, which I would really love to share. So please forgive my narcissism for one more post (if you're lucky).
A few things I'm loving this week...
All the kind words and thoughts that I have received (on behalf of myself and my friends) is heart-warming. It was so moving that complete strangers would take time out of their day to give well-wishes - such a lovely reminder that the world really is filled with generosity and kindness, as much as the media often encourages us to believe otherwise.
Being hit over the head with the fragility of life suddenly made me feel a whole lot more brave. It prompted me to do a few things I probably would not have done otherwise... For example, I directed the lady I would like to be my literary agent (someday) to my blog, sent a finished article to a writer I admire (which I wrote in one night... probably not the best idea, after all) and wrote an email to a site I would love to contribute to. It's not so much the result of these efforts that counts, especially since I did them all on one hour's sleep (although the literary agent did take a look and congratulate me on my writing, which took me by surprise), but the fact that I actually did them gives me a wonderful feeling of accomplishment, as if a weight has been lifted off my shoulders. After all...
"I know it feels like you have all these options and when you make a decision, you lose a world of possibilities. But the reality is, until you make a decision, you have nothing at all."
— Janet Fitch
Even in such a morose situation, frivolity still has its place - a very important place. The last thing we wanted to do this week is to stand around the hospital crying and talking about feelings (well, we did a bit of that, but it wasn't exactly fun, nor very helpful). Thank goodness for pretty things, jokes and general silliness.
The care package I collated for my injured friend
You'd think that, since she has so many other things to worry about, these things I brought her would be futile. That's not true though. Sometimes it's best just to focus on the little things... especially when the big picture is just too painful to bear.
In the same spirit, this week I ditched my impressive, serious book (The Rehearsal, by Eleanor Cattan) for my fun, down-to-earth book (5 Ways to Carry a Goat, by Ben Groundwater). It felt good.