Wednesday, December 9, 2009

relationship contract

This blog post by Simone Heydon inspired me to pen a relationship contract with my lovely boyfriend Andy.

Andy:

* I will give you at least three sincere compliments each day: one on your beauty, one on your delightful personality, and one on something wonderful you have done.

* I will accept that you will never understand my borderline obsessive compulsive complex with cleanliness and tidiness. I will tidy and clean up after you without complaining when the mess involved is negligible.

* I will not be angry with you for being clumsy and absent-minded. This is part of who you are and I love you for it.

* I will not criticise any member of your family, for any reason, not even to join in with you.

* I will occasionally buy you small presents as a thoughtful gesture, for example a magazine, flowers or chocolate.

* I will never take my work stress or bad moods out on you.

* I will kiss you with regularity and passion without prompting.

* I will not get upset when I cook elaborate, gourmet meals for you and you can't eat them because I know quite well how "undeveloped" your palette is.

* I will drive you everywhere, and always open the car door for you.

Laura:

* I will cheerfully watch Top Gear with you, and try my best not to tune out whilst you talk about cars incessantly, indicating my interest by making appropriate noises i.e. "wow", "you're so clever", "what's that?" etc.

* I will put all your DVDs back in their cases when I am done with them instead of leaving them strewn around the room.

* I will let you play playstation without competing with it for your attention. I will even, occasionally, play it with you and not get angry when you ridicule my playing technique.

* If I call you and you don't answer, then you text me instead, I will refrain from calling you again because it probably means you don't want to talk to me at that particular moment (i.e. during a work shift or a "boy's night").

* I will limit my discussion about getting married and what we should call our children.

* I will try my best to be tidy, and not leave glasses of water or Coke Zero on the bedside table where I will inevitably knock them over and damage your expensive surround sound speakers.

* I will let you listen to your music in the car and never, ever criticise your driving.

* I will go to sleep at the same time as you, instead of staying up to watch Law and Order and The Real Housewives of New York City.

* I will not be personally affronted when you are stressed about work or in a bad mood.

* I will not nag you about ettiquete, making decisions for your future, not eating or drinking food and alcohol that you know always makes you sick, taking me on dates, buying me presents and being responsible with money.

* I will never take for granted everything you do for me.

P.S. Andy has declined entering into the contract, however I have noticed more kissing, compliments and patience with my clumsiness and messiness :)

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